I didn’t know I was going to write about Faith, until yesterday. I spent the last two days thinking and writing about FEAR and how it can affect us. But then something happened and I was given a rather unique reminder by a TEDTV clip (that a friend liked on Facebook) about FAITH. Well, it was more about the art of asking; asking for money or asking for help, but to me that translated to faith. By asking for anything you are allowing yourself to become vulnerable and to rely on others. That also means you have to have faith in people, in their goodness, in their desire to help and reach out, etc. It made me think about my own faith; faith in myself and in others.
You see, I have spent my money and time on education for careers that were not really what I wanted and jobs that do not define me or excite me. I worked for a paycheck, not for passion. Through trial and error and my parents (among others) telling me that my dreams were unrealistic and that it would be impossible to get paid to write songs and perform them. So I gave up before I even began. I have kept my hobbies and still enjoy the activities, but I go to work each day unsatisfied and unfulfilled. My parents tell me that “In their day, people went to work to provide for their families, not to find fulfillment in life.” But why do we have to live a life of “have to” or “ought to” instead of “want to” and “love to”?
I have recently been playing out at open mic nights again, where it is an open stage to share your talents. I signed up for some music/hobby related groups and met a few people who now are asking me to play a show at a coffee shop, a restaurant, and even a brewery. I may not be making any money yet, but it gives me hope that I am back on the right path. I lost faith that it was my calling, my destiny. Now, without a ton of effort, these shows are coming to me! I had faith to get back out there and do what I love and hope that others would appreciate my music and my lyrics.
Now that I am getting occasional gigs, I need to send out invites and advertise myself and have faith that my friends and family will show up to see me. When I decide I want to make a CD or start charging a cover, I need to have faith that people will want to pay for the music and entertainment that I provide. On the TEDTV talk Amy Palmer spoke of this giving and receiving and that it is not about making people give you money, it is about asking and knowing that you are giving them something back in return…yourself. I pour my heart and soul into my lyrics. I sing about the lessons I’ve learned, the pain and joy I’ve gone through, and the love I’ve gained and lost. I have enough trust to share my inner most thoughts, so why dont’t I have faith to live it?
I feel like faith or trust is something we have almost immediately from the time we are born. As we get older, we may have experiences where we get hurt, abused, or abandoned, and that faith and that trust is broken. It is hard to do, but in order to live a more fulfilling life I must learn to believe in myself, in my abilities and trust that others will do the same. How can anyone else believe in me and my music if I myself do not? Faith is in our actions. Faith is taking the first step and trusting that the next step will be there when you reach it. Faith is falling into someone’s arms and trusting they will catch you. Faith and love go hand in hand. I believe these are the secrets to living a happy life.